Monday, March 22, 2010

Lauren's Departure

Lauren went home last night.

I’m a crier in general, even more so lately, but let me tell you, it was heart wrenching watching that child go through security at the airport, knowing we couldn’t see her to the plane. So there LW and I stood, waving, crying, waving some more, wishing with everything that we had that we could keep her from boarding that plane. I buried my face in his back, crying, as she soon disappeared out of sight.

And there we stood.

Me with a dozen pink and white roses in my hand. And LW with a broken heart. I have never seen LW cry before. Ever. He’s gotten teary eyed, but I have never ever seen him flat out cry with tears rolling down his face.

We walked in silence as we tried to process the fact that we WILL be seeing her in less than two months. She WILL be home for part of the summer. But still, we ached inside.

I miss her laughter.

After we settled down when we got home last night, and turned on the TV. We sat there and I looked at him and said “This house is far too quiet.” For the rest of the night we sat there in silence mostly. Every now and then I would cry or he would tear up.

It’s amazing how much of an impact she has made on my life. I honestly wasn’t sure I could love someone else’s child as much as I could love my own. But I do. And while I didn’t get to watch Lauren grow up, I will get to see her graduate, get married, have her own family…and I wouldn’t pass that up for anything in the world.

Her being here has reminded me that I am so very lucky. I will never take my love for LW or his children for granted ever. They are and always will be my family.

So I have to go back to the roses…..

I arrived at the airport separately from everyone else (Lauren’s BFF and her family were there as well). I walked up to the ticket counter and Lauren turned and handed me a dozen pink and white roses and a card. I wanted to cry, but I held back. When she walked away later on to get a snack, I opened the card and started crying. The card said something to the fact of ‘you don’t know how amazing you are and how much I appreciate you’ kind of thing. Super, duper sappy. And then she signed it “Love Lauren, your girl.” BIG BIG tears rolled down my face (and still are as I type this!). She was so thoughtful. Later on I asked LW if he knew anything about it and he said no. She did this all on her own and that makes it even more special!

And of course we get home and there on the refridgerator is a note she wrote to us telling us she loved us. I don’t think I will ever be able to take it down.

I miss her so much!

Guess now it’s time for me to clean my monitor off. Too many tears already this morning!


Allison said...

That's such a touching story. I'm so very happy that you've found happiness with your family ((HUGS)) You deserve all of this and more.

Julie D said...

Aw, that's so sweet. How blessed you are to have those "kids" as your own....

Dee said...

Awww I'm sorry boo! It's the same for me when my son leaves or when I go to visit him and I have to leave to come home! It's always so damn hard!! Hugs!

Unknown said...

I couldn't write a better love story than the one you are living now. What was even more touching was knowing that you both felt the same emotions and without words, shared them together.

She is thoughtful but even more so, yours from your heart.

I'm so glad that your life is so full and rich!!

Now, let's see some pictures!

Unknown said...

She's an amazing young lady. I think both of you are blessed to have each other in your lives. Hugs!!!

LV said...

We all need a good eye washing now and then. You are blessed to have this kind of relationship as it does not always work so well. I wish you and your new family the best.